Not Me Monday

Well, since I have nothing but time while sitting here in the hospital, I figured I'd have a little fun. Maybe you can have a little laugh at my expense too! ;) If you'd like to read more funny, humiliating posts, click on the link above and visit MckMama's blog. You can also join in on this Not Me Monday carnival. Here goes my list:

• I did not tear the disc in my back simply by bending over to give Hailey (my 6 year old) a kiss good-bye last Tuesday
• I did not find myself unable to stand up after above mentioned maneuver.
• I did not have to ask my husband to come on over and "straighten me up" while my 6 year old looked at me in horror wondering what "she" did to make me scream!
• After said things I most certainly did not go to work in excruciating pain anyways, because I'm not like that. I listen to my body and stuff ya know!
• When the pain got so bad that I realized I couldn't drive myself home, I most certainly did not decide it would be a good idea to have my co-worker drive me to a restaurant to have lunch with my mom and sister. I mean who would do such a thing?
• After having lunch, I did not find myself in yet even more pain, which did not lead to me literally balling like a baby all the way through the restaurant while having my mom and sister practically carrying me out to the car.
• Of course, I most certainly did not end up in the ER after that...still crying like a baby!
• I most certainly did not need to have a wheel chair to get me in and then my mom most certainly did NOT ram my wheel chair into the desk, ouch!
• Then once the nurse took me to my room, she did NOT also run my wheel chair into the door...that would be so PAINFUL to set me off on yet another crying episode!
• Whew! That would NOT be good.
• Of course, it was not one of those days when you decide that you don't need to shave your legs because after all, who's going to see them?!
• And it wasn't one of those days that I had a cute doctor, no way! That NEVER happens!
• Of course, I did NOT care one bit because I'm married to the most wonderful man on the face of this earth!
• I did NOT spend the next week in the hospital after such a minor thing like bending over and kissing my smallest little girl!
• You most certainly won't need to wait to tune in to hear all the embarrassing things that I didn't do and didn't say over the last week while in the hospital. No way would I make you wait because I'm not too drugged up right now to finish typing this post!

I sure am glad all those things didn't happen to me!